👻 Tubz 🛀 Unfiltered - Volume 54
Halloween Candy Ranked; CFB + NFL Recap.
Happy Monday, y’all!
Technology can be such a pain in the ass. I ordered two external monitors so that I could work like a king, both in my professional work and personal work, and friggin’ j5create, quite possibly the worst docking station known to mankind that I bought from Worst Buy, made me feel like I need a bib when I eat and/or drink. Luckily, Amazon saved the day — as it always does.
Speaking of what else is going on in my life:
🛁 EXTRA BUBBLES 🛁
Happy Halloween! Let’s rank Halloween candy. What are some of your favorite Halloween candies?
Reese’s PB Cups
Sour Patch Kids
Swedish Fish
Butterfinger
Kit-Kat
Snickers
Twix
Starburst
Literal trash
Almond Joy/Candy Corn/Mounds
🏆 SPORTZ 🏆
COLLEGE FOOTBALL RECAP
Ohio State 44 Penn State 31: Penn State head coach James Franklin is so bad against top-5 teams, as his teams are now 1-10 in that department. Specific to Saturday’s contest, it would be one thing if his squad was embarrassed like the fat kid in grade school that is forced to run the mile, but that was not the case necessarily. The Nittany Lions were up by 5 with ~9 minutes remaining in the game after punching it in on 4th and goal.
Ohio State responded with a quick touchdown, Penn State fumbled on the next possession, and the Buckeyes scored one play later to go up 9 and would then run away with it after that. Franklin signed a new 10-year deal a season ago, which I am sure the administration and the fan base are thrilled about. About as thrilled as I was when I got an Almond Joy in my Halloween bucket back in the day. His buyout figures for the next five years:
2022: $72 million
2023: $64 million
2024: $56 million
2025: $48 million
2026: $40 million
Michigan 29 Michigan State 7: I am not highlighting this game because of what happened on the field, though the Wolverines ran it down Sparty’s throat, but I am highlighting this game because of what happened off the field. Michigan State players assaulted Michigan players in the tunnel after the game. Hooligans. Disgraceful, degenerate, no good hooligans.
Next week: (1) Georgia and (2) Tennessee face off in Athens (2:30 PM CST on CBS), and (6) Alabama heads to Baton Rouge to battle against (15) LSU (6:00 PM CST on ESPN).
NFL RECAP
Falcons 37 Panthers 34: First place in the NFC South was on the line, just like we all expected before the season, and Carolina was thisssss close to being in the driver’s seat. PJ Walker connected with DJ Moore on a 65-yard rainbow pass-and-catch to tie the game with seconds remaining, but Moore took off his helmet and acted like a middle school boy on an early release day who is about to play tonsil hockey with his girlfriend in the park.
Immature behavior, yet the NFL promoted it on social media? Huh, interesting. In the same vein, Moore said after the game: “I’ll f*cking do it again.” As a result of the unsportsmanlike conduct penalty, the Panthers were forced to kick a 48-yard extra point. No good.
Fast forward to overtime, and they had a 32-yard field goal to get the hell out of Atlanta with a win after picking off Marcus Mariota, but Eddie Pineiro missed it. More like Eddie Pinata because Carolina fans wanted to hit the crap out of him with a baseball bat.
Patriots 22 Jets 17: Zach Wilson is not HIM. That man boy sucks sh*t. He threw some bone-headed interceptions, inexcusable really, so I do not think he is the long-term option for the franchise. Consider this too: in the prior three games, albeit all victories, he did not throw a single touchdown.
Regardless, a pivotal point in the game — and one could make the argument that it was the deciding point — happened at the end of the first half. Pats QB Mac Jones threw a pick-six, with the Jets already up 10-3, that was called back due to a roughing the passer call. What would have been a 17-3 halftime lead for the Jets turned out to only be a 10-6 halftime lead as New England made a 42-yard field goal as the half expired. The Pats went on to score a touchdown on the first possession of the second half and never trailed for the remainder of the game.
49ers 31 Rams 14: San Francisco head coach Kyle Shanahan is Sean McVay’s daddy during the regular season. The 49ers have now won eight straight regular season games against the Rams. Christian McCaffrey, the great White Hope, had three total touchdowns — 1 passing, 1 rushing, and 1 receiving — and added 94 yards on the ground (18 carries) and 55 yards through the air (8 receptions).
Eagles 35 Steelers 13: The Eagles remain undefeated and AJ Brown absolutely clowned on Pittsburgh’s secondary in the first half, hauling in three touchdown receptions.
Touchdown No. 2:
Touchdown No. 3:
Elite celebrations.
If you chuckled and/or enjoyed, make sure to forward to others and/or share on social. Any corrections, omissions, suggestions, etc., send 'em my way. Much love. -Tubz